A wealth of information vs building rapport

Building rapport and paying attention have become rare commodities, know how to nurture them.


We've entered a time when we're in danger of the attentional impoverishment and the signs of it are the time we spend in front of screens versus in front of others: a couple at a restaurant watching their phones instead of into each other's eyes, a parent ignoring a baby’s cry for attention while looking at a screen, etc.

Daniel Goleman affirms that there are three main ingredients to create rapport. (1) It has to feel good when conversing with another person, a pleasant joy to connect at that level. (2) If we got to look at two people communicating with rapport without sound, they would look like they are in synchrony as if their movements would be choreographed. And for this to happen, (3) full mutual attention is a must. The age of information is making (3) very difficult.

If we want to have real human connections with someone. Do Harvard researchers have to remind us of something we already know? let’s remember this: turn away from our screens, ignore our phones or any other devices, stop our daydream or whatever is on our minds, and let’s pay full attention to the person in front of us.